Michael Crawford was cast as the Lead. Not only that, he was paid an enormous sum of money, the producers assuming that his name alone would sell tickets. It did not. The show closed after only 56 performances losing over $10 million. The problem was that Mikey Boy did not want to do the show as it was written. He had it in his contract that he had creative control, which he took with a vengance. He had the show re-written to make it a stupid farce. He had the director (John Rando) and the Choreographer (John Carrafa) from the previous season's hit comedies Urinetown and Into The Woods and Comedy Writer David Ives brought in to make the transformation from gothic romance to stupid farce. They added stupid accents, dumb jokes, sponges shaped like penises, giant dancing cloves of garlic, Mikey Boy dancing "The Monkey", a cursing Bat puppet, and more! Suddenly the beautiful songs Jim had written were of place and had lost their depth when being sung by an aged ham who was mugging for the audience. The show had been turned into something so totally foreign from what the original creators had envisioned that Jim Steinman refused to even attend the premier.
Here is a Michael Crawford quote from an interview he did prior to the show's opening:
"I went to see the show because they were talking about doing it on Broadway. I initially thought the character was very dark, which wasn't interesting for me... ...I thought it could be swapped around a bit and you could bring in some humor from a different angle. ....David Ives joined the writing team and they went to work and come up with something that appealed to me more. So, fans of the German show, please keep going to Germany and give me a break!"
This shows Mikey Boy's total disregard for the fans of the show. This show's his total ignorance of what made the show work.
Here is a quote from Tanz' writer Kunze about Mikey Boy's DOTV:
"[Polanski] wouldn't have come [even if he were allowed in the U.S.]. The changes wouldn't appeal to Roman. What is shown here is a completely new version. It's a compromise. To Broadway, to the new audience. He wanted it easier, more comical, more American. The German version was too heavy for the new director John Rando."
Here is a quote from a reporter for variety watching rehearsals of DOTV:
"When he isn't singing, Crawford sounds like Bela Lugosi on helium. It is a comedy, after all."
As soon as Mikey Boy was offered the Role he went to the producers and began demanding changes. He said he felt the show should be made funnier, "Like Mel Brooks' Dracula: Dead And Loving It"
On opening night Mikey boy was told by someone in the audience that he was funny. Mikey Boy replied, "I hope I was funny at the right times!" You weren't Mikey Boy... You weren't.
After the show opened the Critics were almost universal in their dislike of what Mikey Boy had done to the show. Here are some quotes from various reviews after the show opened:
"...it's treated as a sophomoric skit, in which labored lines and preposterous acts are presumed to be funny. Boy, does that wear thin fast."
" 'God has left the building!' Crawford intones after entering in a coffin that rises through the floor. God must have seen the script. Vampires invariably goes for the cheap laugh (sponges shaped like genitalia) and can't even get that."
"The surprise is how little impact Crawford makes... His singing remains confident, but is so heavily amplified that he scarcely sounds human. What happened to the suave, romantic, tormented seducer of Phantom? Here, Crawford resembles no one so much as Wayne Newton."
"One of the evening's few intrigues is trying to guess at how consciously Crawford is sending up his celebrated portrayal of the Phantom of the Opera, which made him a star."
"The production is Crawford's first Broadway appearance since his phenomenal success in The Phantom of the Opera 14 years ago. Vampires appears to be an attempt to cash in on that popularity, and the show, consciously and unconsciously, echoes Phantom in all the wrong ways."
"In Vampires, Crawford looks like a shellacked Wayne Newton (check out that ducktail), portraying a Vegas-style vampire named Count Krolock who probably could headline the lounge in one of the lesser Strip hotels. The performer affects a weird, octave-roaming Italian accent, sounding like a combination of Topo Gigio and Tony Soprano."
"Auberjonois, an old pro cast as the determined vampire hunter, lends a credibility to the proceedings. Unfortunately, most of the supporting cast mugs with a fierceness that grows increasingly unfunny."
"What no one involved seemed to realize was that the jokey new book would be at odds with the score, resulting in a show that doesn't seem to have a clue about what it wants to be. Steinman's songs are still largely high-powered anthems ("Braver Than We Are" for the young lovers, Alfred's "For Sarah," Krolock's "Confession of a Vampire"), and several of them are melodically attractive. But any merit the score once had is difficult to discern now that the songs are surrounded by a book in a wholly different style."
"As for the star, Crawford...is trading shamelessly on his Phantom role. Unlike Phantom, Vampires offers him the chance to talk at length and do broad comedy. But where Steve Barton's Vienna Krolock was allowed to be extravagant yet romantic, Crawford looks fairly ludicrous in his Liberace get-up. And because he's now "Count Giovanni von Krolock, from the Sicilian side of the family," he must also adopt a silly accent."
"No one, even after a quart of straight gin, would be able to erase the memory of Mr. Crawford... shrieking... "Total Eclipse of the Heart."
"Mr. Crawford, who has done time in Las Vegas, appears to have picked up a stylistic trick or two there.
With his swept-back lacquered hair and black-on-white contour makeup, he looks like a Goth version of Siegfried, Roy and Wayne Newton combined. Now that, you have to admit, is pretty scary."
"Crawford trades on his personality, poses well on stage, and relishes the ridiculousness of wearing leather pants and speaking in an awful Italian accent (even though his character is named von Krolock)."
"I didn't have a personal vendetta. A personal vendetta would mean that there’s someone in the show that I’m out to get. I mean who was I out to get in the show? Michael Crawford? I’ve never met him. The show was lousy, and I felt that he was lousy in the show. ...I love musically Jim Steinman. ...there was a quite a bit of the score of Dance of the Vampires that I liked very much... I think that Jim’s a great talent and that he was led astray in this instance, but I wish that Jim would write more musicals."
Here is Tanz' author Kunze speaking about why the show failed:
"There have been many other problems that made the show fail. One of them is that Michael Crawford - who basically financed the whole thing - had an entirely different picture of the whole thing that the directors and Jim Steinman had. However, Crawford just had the power to do whatever he thought to be right. From his standpoint, what he did may indeed have been right, because he didn't want to play this romantic freak from "Phantom Of The Opera" again, and so he turned it into a comedy musical. The problem: The piece does not allow this to be done. Sarah must be able to fall truly
in love with the count. It just doesn't work if he's nothing but a comedian anymore."
"This young John Rando is a very talented man, but I guess this project was too big for him. Like talking to a superstar who rejects any well-meant suggestions for change by saying "I don't wanna talk about it anymore."
This excerpt from an article by Michael Riedel after DOTV closed after only 56 performances sheds much light on the reason for the show's failure:
Crawford, it turned out, also wanted Dance Of The Vampires to be a musical comedy. He complained that Krolock, as originally written, was too much like the Phantom and insisted the character be made comic.
"He is paranoid about doing anything that can be compared to the Phantom," a company member says.
Crawford demanded - and was given - complete creative control over his character.
He affected what he called a "Continental accent" - a bizarre mix of Italian and Cockney - because, he said, it made singing Steinman's rock ballads easier.
He also had a hand in designing his own costumes. Crawford is, company members say, obsessed with his weight and demanded ruffled collars to hide his jowls. He looked like a seedy Rum Tug Tugger who'd eaten too many mice. Behind his back, people were calling him a "fat rooster." Only after his friend, entertainment mogul Howard Stringer, told him he looked silly did Crawford agree to lose the collars.
Crawford also rewrote most of his dialogue and put in his own jokes. At one point, bookwriter Ives complained, "I'm not a writer - I'm a stenographer."
Crawford was also rewriting other actors' lines. He did not want his co-star Rene Auberjonois to get laughs, so he insisted that all of his jokes be cut. This led to battles between the two, with each trying to step on the other's punch lines during performances.
And what now for Mikey Boy, now that he ruined Jim's show and got Dance of the Vampires canceled in 2 months when it was scheduled to run for at least 4 years? Well here is an excerpt from a recent article in The Daily Mail:
Michael Crawford has suffered a crushing blow - he has been turned down for the lead role in the West End version of Broadway's hit musical The Producers because, it is claimed, he's 'not funny enough' for the part.
Mel Brooks and Susan Stroman met with Crawford in New York but apparently deemed him 'unfunny'.
The London executives consider Crawford a box office draw, but in New York it's a different story. Once a luminous presence on Broadway thanks to Phantom of the Opera, Crawford couldn't get arrested with his last show there, Dance of the Vampires, which - unlike The Producers' spoof play Springtime for Hitler - bombed big time.
Crawford's friends are putting it about that he turned down The Producers because he didn't want to work with comedian Lee Evans, who has already agreed to play the other main part.
Crawford, it is being said, felt that Evans' comic style was too similar to his own.
However, the word from across the Atlantic is that they said 'no thanks' to Crawford.
A little more evidence of what Mikey Boy did to fuck up what could have been a great musical. Compare these video clips of a Tanz der Vampire Show montage and a Dance of the Vampires show montage!
Then of course they couldn't even get the TV commercials right. Tanz's television spot set the mood perfectly. Dance Of The Vampires TV spot did nothing to make you want to see the show despite costing over $300,000! Check out the spots:
Tanz der Vampire TV Commercial
Dance of the Vampires TV Commercial
You can check out my Interview with Jim Steinman about the Broadway Production of Dance of the Vampires to see what Jim has to say about Mikey Boy:
Dance Of The Vampires Interview with Jim Steinman
Max von Essen was recently interviewed on Seth's Broadway Chatterbox on broadwayworld.com. He had a few interesting comments about Dance Of The Vampires that you can hear here:
Max tells Seth how great Tanz der Vampire was...
Max tells Seth how good Dance Of The Vampires originally was when Steve Barton was Krolock before Mikey Boy was cast...
Max and Seth talk about how Max was good in the show but Mikey Boy has some accounting to do for what he wrought...
Max talks about how Mikey Boy took over writing and directing while Rando was away...
Max tells how much better Mikey Boy's understudy, Rob Evans was the one time he played the role...
I would like to thank both Seth Rudetsky and Broadwayworld.com for their permission to post these short clips from Seth's interview. Seth's show can be heard every weeek on Broadwayworld.com and all proceeds from his show go to Broadway Cares/Equity Fights Aids. Please take a moment to visit their sites and tell them Smeghead sent you!
One Jim Steinman fan claims to have secretly listened in on a production meeting between the producers and director of Dance Of The Vampires and Jim Steinman and original writer Michael Kunze. I have received a transcript of what occured at that meeting. While I can not verify its authenticity it would certainly explain what happened...
PRODUCER 1: OK So we're all in agreement about the ballroom scene.
PRODUCER 2: I still think there's far too much music. And I'm sorry Michael needs a dramatic death scene
DIRECTOR: I know! Alfred could run in and beat Von Krolock to death with the sponge!
(PRODUCERS have a moment of happy thought and then)
PRODUCER 1: No. I haven't seen a story where the vampire is killed with a sponge. Clever idea though.
PRODUCER 3: I know! They can break a window open and the sun can burn the vampire! I saw it when my daughter was watching Buffy! It's brilliant!
MICHAEL KUNZE: It's a Midnight Ball
PRODUCER 1: Excuse me?
JIM STEINMAN: The Ball is at Midnight. There are several references to it . . .
MICHAEL KUNZE: In the script. In the Original Story. In the Movie.
PRODUCER 2: So? We can change it.
DIRECTOR: I have no problem with that. The ball will be at sunrise.
JIM STEINMAN: Why would vampires have a ball at sunrise?
PRODUCER 1: Look who's being a "Mr. We-Can't Do That" again.
PRODUCER 2: All we have heard from you two since we started this production meeting is how we can't cut this and we can't add that. Have you ever worked in REAL theater Mr. Rock Star and Mr. Never-Had-an English Show? Hmm?
PRODUCER 3: So that's settled. Michael will get a big dramatic death scene when somebody breaks a window and lets in the sunlight--
PRODUCER 2: "Let the sunshine in!" Do you think we could add that song while we're at it.
PRODUCER 1: No, that was from that dirty musical. Where they took their clothes off.
PRODUCER 2: Oh. That's right.
JIM STEINMAN: (To the tune of "What ever Lola Wants") Whatever Mikey wants--
MICHAEL KUNZE: Mikey gets.
PRODUCER 1: Excuse Me? Let me remind you, Mr. Acid Rock Music, that Michael is a real Star!
PRODUCER 3: A bright beacon in the firmament.
PRODUCER 1: He had his own show in Vegas. He is what will make this show!
PRODUCER 2: Is he going to be wearing his little glitter glove?
PRODUCER 3: No. That's the other Michael.
PRODUCER 1: We couldn't get that one because someone--(They all look sternly at JIM STEINMAN and MICHAEL KUNZE)-- refused to make Sarah a 12 year old boy.
(Commotion as COSTUME DESIGNER and CHOREOGRAPHER enter. COSTUME DESIGNER is carrying a coat)
COSTUME DESIGNER: Oh My God . You will never believe what I have found! You've heard that "Cats" closed? Anyway, I found Grizabella's coat! I thought Michael could wear it in the opening scene!
PRODUCER 2: Yes! And we could start the show in a junk yard under the full moon and have people dressed as cats crawl onstage and do this big dance number!
JIM STEINMAN: This show takes place in Eastern Europe not some East Side junkyard.
DIRECTOR: No prob. I can fix that. We change the junkyard to castle ruins. And make the cats--
PRODUCER 3: Vampires! Brilliant! But can we keep the moon?
DIRECTOR: No prob. And Grizabella's coat. I just love that.
PRODUCER 2: I thought we were going to start it with the chandelier on the floor and have it rise into place during--
PRODUCER 1: That's during that music thingy at the first--
JIM STEINMAN: The Overture.
PRODUCER 2: Thank you. And it's not the Chandelier. It's the lighting grid. Remember we don't want to be like that other show Michael was in.
COSTUME DESIGNER: Speaking of that scene. What about the "Hairspray" girlfriends.
PRODUCER 3: They are a go. I personally like the black horn rimmed glasses on the one, myself. Where are you two off to?
CHOREOGRAPHER: Are we still doing the Ballroom Scene?
PRODUCER 2: Yes, but we did make it better.
CHOREOGRAPHER: Then I guess I better see what you're supposed to do in one. I heard "Beauty and the Beast" has a ballroom scene. I need to see what they do with it.
COSTUME DESIGNER: Anything else that Von Carlos needs?
MICHAEL KUNZE: It's Von Krolock!
PRODUCER 1: Wait! I like that. Von Carlos. Maybe we could have Michael do it with an Eye-talian Accent!
JIM STEINMAN: For God's sake Why?
PRODUCER 1: Because, It's funny.
COSTUME DESIGNER: We're off. Chaio.
PRODUCER 3: Now where were we? Oh, yes. After the ball. They escape the castle into the wilderness and Sarah and Alfred have that song together. I guess they have to do that. They are the romantic couple. They should do something together. I don't have any problems with this scene.
PRODUCER 2: Is there any way we can bring Michael into it?
JIM STEINMAN: (Aside) I've died and gone to Hell.
MICHAEL KUNZE: Me too.
DIRECTOR: Let me think about it. He did die in the previous scene, but maybe the audience won't notice.
PRODUCER 3: Nah. Leave it. Now this next song.
JIM STEINMAN: "Dance of the Vampires."
PRODUCER 1: We don't understand the first part of it. This part with the Professor.
MICHAEL KUNZE: He is complimenting himself on his brilliance on defeating the vampires.
JIM STEINMAN: Meanwhile Sara is draining Alfred of blood and turning him into a vampire. The Professor is so wrapped up with himself that he is unaware of what is really happening. Then the rest of the vampires come out and celebrate the fact that they won by spreading to the rest of the world.
PRODUCER 1: Oh.
PRODUCER 3: Okay . . . I understand. It's supposed to be funny. It's irony
PRODUCERS 1 & 2: Oh! Irony!
PRODUCER 3: Well, it has to go!
JIM STEINMAN & MICHAEL KUNZE: What?
PRODUCER 1: Yes. It may be a funny. But it is not Michael funny. It has to go. We need to rewrite that first part.
PRODUCER 2: And pounding your heads on the table is not going to help a bit.
PRODUCER 3: We have been over and over this. If it is not Michael funny. It has to go. That is why we cut the other funny parts like Alfred being afraid of driving a stake through a vampire.
PRODUCER 1: Chagal's fooling around with Magda. . . That Jewish Vampire bit.
PRODUCER 2: Sarah's bath obsession.
PRODUCER 3: You know the rules. If it's not Michael funny. It must go. Now when can we expect a rewrite of that first part?
JIM STEINMAN: Here . . .
PRODUCER 3: Well that was quick.
MICHAEL KUNZE: (Aside) You just took "Tonight Is What It Means To Be Young" and crossed out the word "angel" and put "vampire."
JIM STEINMAN: (Aside) They have managed to cut out everything that was funny about this show. Why kill myself writing something new? Besides do you think these people would appreciate it if I did?
MICHAEL KUNZE: True. They might come up with something funny to add. Oh well, maybe we can get it right when it goes to the West End.
PRODUCER 1: Well, I think we're finished fixing this show.
PRODUCER 2: That reminds me I need to take my cat in to be neutered.
JIM STEINMAN: So we're done?
PRODUCER 3: I think so.
PRODUCER 2: By the way, has anyone ever told you that your music sounds like that MeatBall singer?
Here is an excerpt from Don Black's biography, Wrestling With Elephants, where a director talks about what a prima donna ass Mikey Boy was on the set of a show way back in the 70's... proving that Mikey Boy has always been a jerk.
Original Sin as Massacred by - Mikey Boy
Just listen to Mikey boy ruining his first number. The stupid accent, the people laughing. Compare it to Steve Barton's haunting Demo above. Nobody Laughed at Steve. This was the point we all knew Mikey Boy had killed the Count.
A Good Nightmare Comes So Rarely as Massacred by - Mikey Boy
When Jim first wrote this little introduction I thought the words and tune were quite romantic and the lyrics very clever. Then Mikey Boy got it into his head that he was a squeeky Voiced Bat. Compare it to The Original Into on the Invitation to the Ball Demo above.
Braver Than We Are (Single Version) - Elaine Caswell - This was an alternate, early, version of God Has Left The Building that briefly appeared on the official DOTV website with the comment that it took place near the end of the musical.
God Has Left The Building Alternate Version #1 - I'm not sure of when this version was recorded or if it had some other purpose. It reminds me of the soundtrack of the FLASH promotion on the official DOTV website.
God Has Left The Building Alternate Version #2 - This is probably the earliest recording of God Has Left The Building. It comes from April 30, 2002. Instead of a full recording the instrumental from Neverland's Formation Of The Pack was just inserted in the middle of the song.
God Has Left The Building Alternate Version #3 - This recording is dated July 30, 2002.
Carpe Noctem Rehearsal Track - This is a recording of Carpe Noctem used for dance and vocal rehearals that does not have the lead vocals.
The following recordings were made at the piano during rehearsals:
Original Sin (Piano Rehearsal)
Garlic (Piano Rehearsal #1)
Garlic (Piano Rehearsal #2)
Logic (Piano Rehearsal)
There's Never Been A Night Like This (Piano Rehearsal #1)
There's Never Been A Night Like This (Piano Rehearsal #2)
Invitation To The Ball (Piano Rehearsal #1)
Invitation To The Ball (Piano Rehearsal #2)
Braver Than We Are Part 1 (Piano Rehearsal)
Braver Than We Are Part 2 (Piano Rehearsal)
Braver Than We Are Part 3 (Piano Rehearsal)
Red Boots Ballet (Piano Rehearsal)
Say A Prayer & Come With Me (Piano Rehearsal)
Total Eclipse Of The Heart (Piano Rehearsal)
Books (Piano Rehearsal #1)
Books (Piano Rehearsal #2)
Confessions Of A Vampire (Piano Rehearsal)
The Ball (Piano Rehearsal #1)
The Ball (Piano Rehearsal #2)
The Ball (Piano Rehearsal #3)
